Yes, it’s been a long standing complaint and yes, it’s a song I’ve regrettably sung many times before, but why the hell do modern animated projects concerning Kaiju insist on holding off on the main reason that brings most viewers to the party?
I’ve gone on about this before until I’m blue in the face and while I understand the people responsible are trying to build up a sense anticipation, to me it just feels like a huge waste of the medium of animation. Why limit your options when the fact that it’s a cartoon removes all such boundaries – the makers of both the 1978 Hanna-Barbera Godzilla series and the 1998 sequel to the Roland Emmerich movie knew this and made damn sure that they had the Big G wallop the crap out of a trouble making monster every episode. In comparison, Skull Island has had us waiting until its fifth episode to present us with its towering titan. However, is it a case of too little too late?
The time has come for Irene and her small band of mercenaries to put their plan into action and take Dog out of the picture in order to get to Annie. Their plan, in case you’ve forgotten, is to lure the hulking hound into the middle of a field of red plants that proves to be the hunting ground of a huge bird of prey and hope that nature takes its course. Well, for once, something finally goes right for the unwilling inhabitants of Skull Island and after successfully tranquilising Annie, the big-ass bird shows up right on cue, scoops Dog up into its talons and disappears into the big blue sky.
While Charlie and Mike struggle to process this turn of events, the more pertinent news is that Charlie is now reunited with his father, Cap, who has teamed up with Irene and her flunkies for survival. However, Cap learns from Mike that Hiro, Mike’s father had actually secured funding from Irene’s people to make their ill-fated expedition in the first place and that’s how they knew where Skull Island was in the first place.
While Annie sleeps off her drug-tipped dart, Charlie has a run in with a mysterious, hooded, spearing carrying native that leads to him also getting carried off by that ginormous bird. However, while we finally learn more about Annie’s parentage and Mike finally succumbs to his chest wound, Charlie finds that instead of being fed to a nest of giant, squalling chicks, he’s left as an offering on a tall structure along side a still-living Dog.
While this initially may sound like good news, if Charlie and his disinterested companion have any hope of escaping, the flustered teen will have to overcome Dog’s dislike of him in order for them to work together to climb down.
However, they soon discover that they aren’t alone as this structure seems to also act as the (litteral) swingers pad of one Kong – the God of Skull Island.
Doggone It, is an episode that sees the season finally open up a bit and not only give us a decent helping of Kong, but also starts giving out some tidbits concerning the some of the unspoken motivations of some of our major players. We’ll come back to Kong in a minute (if the show can make us wait, so the hell can I) and focus on the human drama for a bit and one of the two main revelations is that Hiro funded the doomed voyage with money from Irene and that Mike knew about it all along. While this isn’t mega-shocking primarily because we’re still not 100% sure on what Irene’s deal is, its soon eclipsed by the fact the Mike’s chest wound kicks into full gear and has him spasming on the ground line a nut-shot skateboarder and a far more interesting nugget from Irene’s past finally comes to the surface. However, spilling the beans that Annie is Irene’s daughter didn’t come across as seismic as hoped, mainly because I’d sort of already chalked that up as a viable reason in my head already – but no doubt things will become clearer by the next episode. Of course, the most interesting aspect of the episode is the arrival of a masked and shrouded human who, judging by the blue ink on their arms, surely belongs to the Iwi last seen sheltering Hank Marlow in Kong: Skull Island. The reason that this is so intriguing is that it would be the first real aspect of the show that’s directly linked to the 2017 movie, with everything else (Kong included) arguably being merely circumstantial. After all Skull Island and Kong have been a part of almost every iteration the great ape has been involved in, so the arrival of something right out of Jordan Vogt-Roberts’ energetic adventure is incredibly welcome. Don’t worry, I’m sure Skullcrawlers are soon to follow.
However, once we leave the pesky humans and turn our eyeballs over to the plight of Charlie and Dog, business starts to pick up. Dumped on a tower pedestal by the giant, red bird, the mismatched pair struggle to stay on the same page as the thoroughly disinterested Dog is initially (and understandably) resistant to Charlie’s whines of protest, but eventually the two start to climb down the sheer, stone face. What they find is Kong, moping and maudlin in a somber sort of mood as he fawns over a collection of what looks like human bric-a-brac which raises yet another question: what is the relevance of the necklace Kong is especially fond of? Is it a connection to Brie Larson’s Mason Weaver or is there further, untold tales of other women in the life of pop culture’s hairiest ladies man?
Seeing the big guy swing and leap around his realm is undeniably cool and even though we don’t get much more than some leaping, some brooding and a bit of textbook roaring, hopefully this is a sign that the show is about to slip into high gear and indulge in some grade-A craziness I’m confident the show still has in it.
A quick glance back at the show’s trailer does in fact reveal that there is much more to come with only three episodes left to view, but I can’t help but wonder: has show creator Brian Duffield waited too long before letting the show off the leash – assuming he even has, that is. There’s only one way to find out, but if Kong doesn’t start throwing his weight around and picking fights with some of his marauding neighbours soon, this trip to Skull Island may very well be chalked up as a monstrous, missed opportunity.
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