Cynicism is a cruel mistress – just take the effect it has on instances of popular culture that just simply want to entertain without weighing itself down with pesky nuisances like realism, or common sense. However, while we now live in a world where James Bond can totally die and the last Indiana Jones movie involved a fair amount of aged navel gazing, the occasional bit of levity can go a long way – but how much is too much.
Right from the get go, Arnold Schwarzenegger’s new Netflix show, FUBAR, made great pains to be as frothy and goofy as possible from the opening moments of the opening episode, channeling the silliest moments of Roger Moore’s Bond tenure with the farcical nature of James Cameron’s True Lies. However, with its second episode, the show immediately brings up a sizable issue with making your action/comedy as threatening as a two for one sale at Build-a-bear – if you make things too breezy, is anyone actually going to give a shit?
When last we left squabbling father/daughter secret agent duo Luke and Emma Brunner, they were being held at gunpoint after trying to escape the compound of ruthless terrorist Boro Polonia. However, while you’d think that the act of staring down the barrels of various guns would be the most stressful aspect of this mission gone bad, its nothing compared to the fact that Luke and Emma had no idea that the other was a capable, but controlling, CIA agent until midway through the mission and tensions are running high.
The good news is that the duo manage to make their escape with Boro’s WMD, the bad news is that the terrorist also makes a swift getaway, free to make another weapon to sell to the highest bidder. However, much to the Brunner’s annoyance, their bosses decree that Luke’s retirement is temporarily postponed and that he has to work alongside Emma until the threat is brought down and immediately the barbed comments start flying as the two instantly get on each other’s nerves. Adding fuel to the fire is their bosses insistence that the two undergo therapy under the eye of Dr. Pfeffer, whose methods are… shall we say, different, not to mention incredibly irritating.
As Luke and Emma’s support staff of Barry, Roo, Aldon and newbie Tina try to keep things running smoothly while simultaneously deriving vast amounts of enjoyment from the drama, plans are formulated to thwart Boro’s attempt to gain the materials to make a second bomb by hijacking a high-speed train that’s barreling through Kazakhstan. However, can either agent manage to keep their head in the game when family matters keep getting in the way – I mean, could you focus if you found out that your ex-wife’s boyfriend had just popped four viagra in preparation for a night of passion while engaging in a gunfight with a helicopter?
As I mentioned before – and will surely no doubt mention again as we make our way through this series – “silly” is the keyword here as FUBAR is show that is utterly unafraid to pitch complete and utter nonsense in order to keep the gags flowing faster than spiked punch on prom night. The sheer amount of goofy bullshit this episode attempts to get you to swallow in order to serve up yet unlikely scenario is truly impressive, but if you have even an ounce of that aforementioned cynicism I mentioned at the top of the review, FUBAR will simply come across as dumb as fuck.
For a start, there’s more chance of Vin Diesel’s Dominic Toretto dying from inhaling petrol fumes than there is for any character in FUBAR even coming remotely close to true peril as everyone involved seems to have put a restraining order out on the angel of death much in the way the throwback heroes of 80’s and 90’s did. While this isn’t an issue just yet (was anyone truly expecting a shock death in the early days of a show this fluffy?), it does render a lot of the early action decidedly drama-free as Arnie goes through his usual repertoire. In fact, while we’re on the subject, one thing the does quite well is how it Specs out those action beats as each episode so far sort of bookends each installment like the serials of old as one episodes starts with the resolution of the last’s cliffhanger, only to end with another one so the next can hit the ground running. Connoisseurs of the John Wick school of action artist may balk at the splitting of the more adrenaline fueled moments of the show, but it’s a wise move while the action is yet to carry any true emotional weight.
That leaves the comedy to carry the load and while these are familiar waters for Arnold an co., such seasoned comic performers as Jay Baruchel and Fortune Feimster are noticably having to reach for the chuckles. It isn’t that the show isn’t amusing, but jokes like Luke repeatedly insisting on using the word “cuckold” incorrectly, or Emna using comparisons of the Beatles and Flavor Flav to prove her point just aren’t laugh out loud funny.
FUBAR’s real issue, however, is still how shamelessly close the show is to True Lies, adopting much more from the 90s classic than just its leading man. Prepare for yet another dizzying wave of deja-vu as jokes and entire chunks of plot are shifted over wholesale that sees Arnie fixing his ex-wife’s boyfriend with the same humourless glare he once locked onto Bill Paxton’s creeper of a car salesman and have him force his protesting partner to fit spy cameras around the place to dig up dirt on this wannabe suitor. Maybe enough time has past for younger viewers to see this as fresh material, but to me, 1994 still feels like yesterday and FUBAR might need to change up its act if it wants to tread a similar path.
Still, there’s still some good meat to chew on here – Luke’s relationship with Gabriel Luna’s Boro is nicely personal, especially considering Luke’s rant about how he made the villain’s father decidedly un-alive and Emma’s anxieties about her job trashing her relationship much like it did her parents is a quiet moment amidst the whirlwind of hit and miss one liners.
If you can push past the absurdity of the script (no therapist in creation would prescribe magnetic vests in order to help his patients to literally bond), the glib nature of FUBAR is still pleasantly diverting, but if the show doesn’t employ some new ideas quickly, it’ll soon wear out its welcome – much like Luke crashing yet another dinner he wasn’t invited to…
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