
At the tail-end of season three, Robert Zemeckis gave us a Tale that technically wasn’t a true Tale at all. That episode was “Yellow” and it ditched the usual settings the show tended to stick to in order to give us a story set during the First World War that dealt with a General trying to deal with his Lieutenant son’s abject cowardice. The reason for the tonal shift is because the episode was originally part of the failed, three-episode pilot of spin-off show, Two-Fisted Tales and after it wasn’t picked up for series, they were subsequently deployed into Crypt in order to get their money’s worth.
Well, it’s time for another one to surface in the form of Richard Donner’s “Showdown”, a western-based episode that brings that Crypt-style cynicsm to the world of gunslingers and cowboys. But even with the director of Lethal Weapon and Maverick pulling the trigger, can the episode rise above its repurposed nature just as well as Zemeckis’ effort?

Lightning quick outlaw Billy Quintaine is on the run from the posse that’s barely a few hours in his wake, but he still takes a few minutes to put a bullet into his mortally wounded partner, Harley, in order to speed him on his way. After burying the man, Quintaine continues on to the nearest town where he hopes to drown his sorrows in the nearest bottle of hooch, but before he can get properly settled, he finds that Texas Ranger “Tracker” Tom McMurdo has finally caught up with him.
Challenging his quarry to a showdown in the centre of town, both ranger and outlaw are supremely confident that their own arm is far faster on the draw than their opponent’s, but after both irons are pulled from their holster, it’s ultimately Quintaine who proves to be the quicker. Leaving McMurdo in a bloody pile in the street, the outlaw finds himself in the local tavern where his mood is disturbed by Cornelius Bosch, a travelling salesman who claims he has a wonder elixir that will sharpen the senses and quicken the wits.
However, after knocking this mystery concoction back down his gullet, soon Quintaine starts to notice some rather disturbing side-effects. Filling out the rest of the saloon is every single man that he’s ever killed – including McMurdo – and they’ve all gathered in this place to convince their killer to come with them to the afterlife. Obviously, the gunslinger isn’t feeling particularly receptive to that idea, but after vehemently refusing, he discovers that he didn’t emerge from that showdown as healthy as he thought he did. After discovering that he was later shot down by the rest of McMurdo’s posse, he’s been haunting the saloon ever since and the final proof he needs is the appearance of a modern day tour group as the place has been turned into a cowboy themed museum/amusment park in the present day. But now that he’s fully aware of his tragic predicament, can Quintaine finally move on into the next life?

For anyone who hasn’t experienced any of the three random Two-Fisted Taled episodes before, the first thing you notice is that the tone of the episode is decidedly different. While we’re still dealing with supernatural playoffs, outlandish twists and enough tragic irony to choke a whale, there’s a more maudlin and sensitive feel than what you usually get whenever the Crypt Keeper feels a story coming on. Much like Robert Zemeckis’ “Yellow”, the use of another genre entirely helps things feel fresh after all the recent, contemporary set episodes; but there’s something else that marks this episode out as important – it’s the final Crypt entry of Richard Donner. This is something of a big deal because not only is Donner one of the “big three” directors who helmed the superlative series premiere back in 1989, but his previous two episodes proved to be not only standouts of their respective seasons, but serious contenders for all time best installments. Needless to say, considering the drop off in quality of Walter Hill’s third and last episode last season, I was hoping that Donner can break that streak before it starts.
While “Showdown” is indeed a highly decent episode that adds a few, new, emotional strings to the Crypt Keeper’s bow, even the rather somber mood and mature attitude can’t stop it from being Donner’s weakest episode, but when you realise that it’s up against a whacked-out story about a carnival performer who has nine lives and a deranged tale involving the parasitic conjoined twin of a reclusive ventriloquist, it’s no surprise that it comes up a little short. However, the lack of mutant twins and an undying Joe Pantoliano doesn’t mean that this story of a gunslinger’s misplaced spirit isn’t worth your time. In fact, it’s rather sweet to see a Crypt offering be so self-reflective.

It helps that Neil Giuntoli (probably best know to horror fans as Eddie Caputo from the original Child’s Play) gets to play his swaggering gunslinger with differing shades of emotions. When we first see him, he’s a callous, swaggering killer who may take pride in killing folks “fair and square”, but after out-shooting David Morse’s texas ranger, we find that his pride is proved to be chopped down to size by his overwhelming visitation from the dead. Watching Quintaine freaking the fuck out when surrounded by the multitudes of men he’s put in the dirt is quite the powerful image and the script – from none other than Frank Darabont – builds the suspence nicely as the terrible realisation sets in with our lead. However, what’s especially refreshing (and completely unexpected for a Tales From The Crypt entry) is that the ghosts of the slain don’t actually bear their killer any ill will and just want him to understand that he’s actually dead after McMurdo’s men blew him to pieces.
The moment when we realise that Quintaine is not only dead, but he’s been haunting the saloon all the way up to the present day is genuinely shocking, especially when a tour group walks in much to his confusion. But there’s something legitimately sad about the visual of a gunslinger struggling to accept that his time has long since passed. Yes, this somewhat passive form of a ghost story is atypical of what the show is usually all about (actual feelings?), but Donner and Darabont manage to deliver something that’s maybe a bit too straight for the more hard-core fan. Additionally, where else are you going to find a haunted western, because surely such things are about as rare as a rock opera war film.

The nature of the episode’s origin means that both Donner and Darabont’s last trip to the Crypt isn’t close to being the horror blowout of their last collaboration, but they can take solace in the fact that this Two-Fisted Tale manages to deliver something a little deeper than just the old karma related gut-punch. Even when it’s episodes come from other sources, season four continues to shoot from the hip.
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