I’ve hailed many aspects that make Spanish horror odessy, 30 Coins, so rewarding to watch, from the sheer momentum of the series to the various, brain-searing, scenarios and creatures that the show hurls at you multiple times an episode; but one aspect I’ve neglected to discuss up until now is how funny Alex de la Iglesia’s warped brainchild can truly be. Oh, it’s not normal funny – not by a long shot; but some of the things that happen to its hapless cast are usually so extreme, you can’t help but let out a dark chuckle or two.
It’s with this in mind that we approach Hellish Creatures, the third episode of 30 Coins’ second season that proves to be, pound for pound, one of the funniest installments that the show has ever delivered. We shouldn’t really be surprised as a lot of Iglesias’ previous work has displayed this streak of sardonic amusement in the face of some truly outlandish shit, but episode 3 really pulls it out of the… womb?
Once again, we start proceedings in Hell a year earlier as we continue to be drip fed what exactly happened to Vergara after he awoke in the fiery realm and his deal with Angelo takes an interesting twist when it’s revealed that none other than Cardinal Santoro, the priest’s former friend turned enemy, will be aiding him on his mysterious mission. Obviously this causes friction, but if you can’t find a little social awkwardness in Hell, where can you find it?
Elsewhere, the villainous Barbrow continues preparing for whatever apocalyptic plans he has for the world by obtaining an ancient tome that goes by the catchy moniker of the Black Book of the Mad Arab and whose contents are so dangerous, to even glance at the writing on a single page will cause your eyeballs to painfully bleed. After securing the volume, he briskly marches out of the library as the book’s keeper writhes on the floor clutching his blood filled eye sockets.
So far, so ominous, but while Haruka, Salcedo and Laguna continue to try and decipher Antonio’s garbled visions and the Pope takes supernatural steps to flush out any remaining Cainites from the Vatican, three regular cast members are preparing to face whole new lives.
The first is Merche, who now has been chosen by Lagrange to be his fist when reclaiming the scattered coins thanks to the devastating powers she has while holding one of the cursed trinkets. Her mission? Go to Mexico to take two more coins by force – simple really.
However, the other two people having to wrestle with a new status quo is naturally Elena and Paco with the latter back from hell and now with unholy child. But a mere two days of pregnancy, the “child” is ready to be born and nothing is going to stop it!
So, before we launch into the crazier aspects of this episode, let’s focus on the weaker strands of Hellish Creatures first and the main one is still a distinct lack of Eduard Fernandez’s pugilist padre, Vergara who has been solely relegated to Hellish flashbacks thus far. While its undoubtedly building to something intriguing, especially now that he has to team with hated enemy Santoro for an undisclosed reason; but the hole he leaves in virtually every episode is getting more and more noticable. Also noticable by their pseudo absence is Elena and Paco who are also suffering by not yet actually part of the main plot – whatever the hell that might actually be – as the latter is still in the grip of obsessive love that’s gone way beyond adorable and the former has spent the last two episodes either running around in Hell or hanging ten in a coma. While it’s good that Iglesia isn’t resting in his laurels, I do miss the three leads getting stuck into a good, fucked up mystery , but I guess the show has moved on way beyond the limited parameters of Pedraza. Another issue is that not nearly enough screen time has been given to Paul Giamatti’s big bad, Barbrow, and while the first season played the slow burn routine with both Santoro and Angelo, I’m yearning for Giamatti to have an excuse to cut loose with some choice, eye bulging, scene chewing villainy.
Sitting somewhere in middle are the continuing investigations of the four side characters who seen to be filling in for Paco and Elena as they try to unravel all the vast conspiracies but so far it’s mostly amounted to Antonio running backwards and forwards on top of a wind turbine while Haruka struggles to keep her camera phone on him and again, while the pressure is nicely building, it’s in danger of getting repetitive.
What isn’t getting repetitive is the highly anticipated rise of Macarena Gomez’s Merche, who now finds herself being used as Lagrange’s muscle in his search for more coins. With the life of her newly acquired child hanging in the balance, she’s hustled off to Mexico to face down an ex-Cainite who’s hoarding two. Is it something of a side mission that takes up a bit too much time away from the other threads? Probably, but it doesn’t matter as watching Merche go from henpecking wife to superpowered hitwoman is strongly becoming the second season’s most entertaining, if utterly left field, thread and after wiping out her foe and avoiding a giant, scythe swinging grim reaper puppet come to life, she makes it out with six coins in her possession due to a little plot massaging. However, she’s not done there as she is rescued by none other than Barbrow, guaranteeing that further ascension is still to come.
Having a far less fun time of it is, of course, Elena, who has awakened from her hell-coma to find that a) she’s now pregnant, b) Paco become almost pathological in his clinginess and c) he expected them to live happily ever after in a roach filled shithole until they can make ends meet. It’s ignoble treatment for 30 Coins most endearing character, but there’s even rocker roads ahead as her pregnancy kicks it up a notch and has her ready to drop whatever’s in her womb at any minute and its here that we reach the episodes most blackly hilarious scene. As Elena balloons to a size far beyond a regular birth, the only person equipped to help is the backdoor abortionist he’s mistakenly hired as a midwife and as she starts lounging her hands into Elena’s violently pulsating nether regions the panicked asides from everyone involve are fucking gold. But we’re not done there, as Elena finally gives birth to a milky sack the size of a football that suddenly sprouts spider legs and starts skittering all over the room causing yet more hysterical panic until it seemingly dies under a cupboard.
Where any of this goes is anyone’s guess, but that unpredictable nature is exactly the lure of the show, but while this episode proves to be immensely funny, there’s a feeling that the season really needs to get its A-squad back in the game.
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