We live in a time where long running franchises seem to have a set vision and a badic plan on where they’re going and how they’ll end up, but on the flip side of that coin is whatever the Hell was going on with the Puppet Master franchise as it hurtled toward the end of the 90s. With installments that bounced wildly from WWII set prequels to fantasy adventures that saw the dolls turn good to fight demons, it was fairly obvious that Charlie Band’s Full Moon Features didn’t have an Scooby’s about where they wanted their unfaltering, killer puppet series to go next. As if any further proof was needed, the sixth installment arrived with a new direction, a new(ish) director and even a title that went and switched out the conventional numbering sequence – but what seemed especially erratic was that this latest venture seemed to shy away from the epic, two-part adventure that typified the last couple of instalments. Were the puppets going bad again? Would we get a more serious tone this time? And could director David DeCoteau try to restrain himself from casting lost of beefy males in tight t-shirts? Anyone familiar with his cinematic history will aleady know that last one gonna be a definite no…
Despite the last movie ending with tech geek Rick Myers being named the newest Puppet Master by the ghost of Andre Toulon, we find that in our absence, a whole lot of retconing has gone on which all but removes the demon fighting continuity from the last couple of escapades. For a start, the man in possession of the puppet posse this time around is Dr. Magrew, the owner of a doll museum who keeps Blade, Pinhead and the rest of the gang locked away and out of sight for their own safety. However, for reasons left unanswered thanks to the usual Full Moon plotting, it seems that he’s obsessed with creating a living puppet of his own to join the ranks of the lethal playthings but just can’t get it right.
When his daughter, Jane, returns from college, she seems confused that his previous assistant is no longer around, but while out one day, Magrew notices that the hulking simpleton the town knows as “Tank” actually has the hands of an artist and promptly hires him to help him carve his new attempt at creating puppet life. Settling in with Mugrew, Jane and the gaggle of puppets, Tank (real name Richard) may have finally found a home, but the local bullies in the area simply don’t seem to want him to be happy.
Of course, when you have a cadre of killer dolls in your corner, I guess you don’t have to sweat the small things, but when the local police start getting suspicious about a rash of killings and the disappearance of Mugrew’s last assistant, things start to unravel. Just what sacrifices does it take to make a living puppet and how far is Mugrew willing to go to achieve his twisted dream. One thing’s for sure, the puppets have turned on obsessive masters before and if Mugrew doesn’t watch his step, they’ll do it again.
Considering that the last installment of the Puppet Master franchise seemed to style itself as a “final chapter” (yes, those quotation marks are forged out of pure sarcasm), there’s a fair chance that Curse Of The Puppet Master is supposed to be some sort of soft reboot that keeps the puppet’s origins and looks intact, but instead just spins out a whole new adventure for them without a sniff of the Bodega Bay Inn or pepperoni-nippled demons from Hell. However, if we are starting from scratch, then maybe the filmmakers shouldn’t have crammed the opening credits full with a sizzle reel of the diminutive group’s greatest hits from previous movies. However, regardless on whether this sixth installment is stand alone, or is just another example of the producers not giving the slightest of fucks, it’s still very much another cheap, thrown together installment that’s trying to milk the name for all it’s worth.
However, I’m going to cut the franchise a break an focus on the good things first and even though the shift into an almost Frankenstein style story is something of tonal leap, it’s actually kind nice to see the nastier side of the puppets come out once again. This is because DeCoteau (here directing under the pseudonym Victoria Sloan) has marshaled the little fuckers once before in Puppet Master III where they famously squared off against the Third Reich and say what you will about his flat direction and a penchant for featuring a lot of himbos in a shirt-off scenario, the dude respects the classics. For a start, despite the fact that he understandably omits Decapitron and also disappointingly leaves out Torch (why’s this franchise always doing my little flaming boy dirty?), he’s got the rest of the full squad present, including an inexplicably resurrected Leech Woman.
Also, whenever the ploy and budget allow, the fact that the twist is Mugrew can only birth a new puppet by infusing it with the life force of a sacrifice means we get the odd bit of doll related body kicking around that include Trank dreaming his has wooden legs or mechanical insides, or a failed experiment that a writhing, squealing human/puppet hybrid. DeCoteau also isn’t afraid of slinging the blood around, either when Blade is performing a particularly vicious facial massage or when Tunneler deems it prudent to drill a rapist in the crotch, but while it seems that the director has mastered his puppets, the flaws soon start pouring in.
While some of the puppets are well served (even Jester gets off his arse to help this time), the slightly more elaborate dolls tend to just stand by and watch Blade and Pinhead do all the hard work. However, even when standing almost perfectly still at the edge of the frame, even the most lackadaisical puppet still manages to act all the humans clean off the screen. While it certainly doesn’t help that the cast has dialogue that sounds like it’s come straight out of a porno with such humdingers as “The brain is the most overrated organ that there is.” and someone noting that someone else has big hands only to be told “Comes with the rest of me.”; having them also give performances worthy of a porno too just torpedoes any chance the film has of being taken seriously.
It’s a shame, because at its core, the basic story is classic Puppet Master fare and even includes a final act pile on when the dolls have decided that their boss has gone too far – although they surely could have stopped him long before he turns Tank into a toy version of his namesake in the most awful puppet design the franchise has ever seen – yes, even worse than Decapitron.
And yet, after nearly a decade of puppet pageantry, my continued interest in the franchise now purely comes from a masochistic urge to see what shit they choose to pull next. OK, maybe that’s not exactly what you’d call the optimum reason to follow a franchise with the longevity of the Energizer Bunny, but it’ll keep me going the deeper I tread into Full Moon’s prize and joy. Either that or Pinhead puts me out of my misery by throttling me to death…
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